Why Obstacles Feel Heavy: The Psychology Behind Business Challenges
What feels like a five-alarm fire to you might barely register to your clients. Here’s why—and how to keep moving anyway.
Recently, I shared a story on the blog called "Your Business Isn’t Broken—It’s Just Backed Up" about obstacles, our perceptions and business challenges.
Here’s how it went: It was Easter Sunday, and I had a house full of family and friends. In my rush to prepare the meal for everyone, I made what seemed like a small mistake – I put 10 pounds of potato peels down the disposal. Anyone who knows basic plumbing is probably cringing right now.
Within minutes, my sink was backed up, murky water threatened to overflow, and panic set in. Thankfully, I had a good friend who is a plumber. One emergency call later, he was in my kitchen fixing the mess while I continued serving dinner to my guests. The gathering went on, and everyone ate and enjoyed themselves, so what felt like a disaster to me was barely felt by everyone else.
By the end of the evening, not only was my disposal unclogged, but I'd also gained some unexpected insights about handling crises that apply perfectly to business challenges. (For the full story and all the lessons I drew from it, check out the full article here.)
But here’s the thing—the problem was easy to fix, and while it provided a story for years to come, my family didn’t experience the stress and chaos I did.
This got me thinking about why business obstacles feel so heavy and all-consuming when we're in the middle of them. Let’s talk about the psychology behind our response to business challenges and why reframing them as opportunities is more than just positive thinking—it's a practical strategy for sustainable success.
Catastrophes as Business Challenges
Ever notice how when you find a spelling error on your website you think it makes your business look bad? Or can a trying interaction with a client make you feel like your business is falling apart?
There's psychology behind this response.
Our brains are wired for threat detection. It's a survival mechanism —overreacting to a potential threat is better than underreacting and becoming complacent with the issues. This same mechanism creates problems in business contexts.
When we face obstacles:
1. Your brain’s alarm system activates before the reasoning centers. This triggers a threat response (fight, flight, freeze) before we can assess the situation. That's why your first reaction to a business challenge is often emotional rather than strategic.
2. We imagine the worst possible outcome." Our minds naturally go to worst-case scenarios. A delayed launch becomes "my whole business is failing." A critical email becomes "everyone hates my work."
3. We think everyone’s watching and judging us. Like my thinking that everyone at Easter dinner was focused on my plumbing disaster, we overestimate how much attention others are paying to our challenges or mistakes.
The result? Business obstacles feel disproportionately threatening, all-consuming, and visible to others.
The Cost of These Obstacles
This mental response doesn't just feel uncomfortable—it actively hinders our ability to navigate challenges effectively:
Tunnel vision. Stress makes our thinking shrink. We get stuck in the weeds and can’t see creative or big-picture solutions—right when we need them most.
Stuck or scattered. When everything feels like a crisis, it’s hard to decide anything. We freeze up… or panic and make snap decisions we regret.
Drained and exhausted. Staying on high alert burns up our energy, leaving us too tired to find real solutions.
Out of touch with gut instincts. When we’re in survival mode, we lose access to the deeper wisdom that often leads to the best answers.
This helps explain why some of us get stuck in cycles of reaction and burnout. Each obstacle triggers a stress response that makes the next obstacle even harder to navigate.
The Lightness of Opportunity
Here, viewing obstacles as opportunities doesn't just make you feel better—it creates measurable cognitive and physiological changes that enhance your problem-solving capacity.
When you stop seeing obstacles as danger signs and start seeing them as data or stepping stones, everything changes:
1. Your thinking brain stays in charge. That smart part of your brain (the one that plans, problem-solves, and gets creative) doesn’t shut down in panic mode.
2. You stay mentally flexible. Instead of locking into one way out, you can actually see more options and paths forward.
3. You save your energy. You’re not wasting brainpower freaking out—you’re using it to make real progress.
4. You can hear your gut. That quiet, intuitive knowing—the part of you that actually gets your business and your people—stays online and ready to help.
And this isn’t just feel-good fluff. Performance psychology supports it: Top athletes, CEOs, and creatives all practice this mindset shift. They don’t treat problems like threats—they treat them like puzzles worth solving.
Practical Reframing: From "Oh No" to "I Wonder..."
So how do you make this shift when staring down a real business mess?
Try this simple but powerful tool:
The “I Wonder” Reframe
Catch yourself in chaotic, all-or-nothing thinking. (“This launch is a disaster!”)
Pause and breathe. Three deep breaths help calm your nervous system and get you out of fight-or-flight mode.
Get curious instead. Swap doom statements for open-ended wonder: “I wonder what this is showing me about my process?”, “I wonder what opportunity is hiding in this mess?”, “I wonder what my future self would notice that I can’t see yet?”
This small language tweak creates big shifts. It quiets your brain’s alarm bells and reboots your ability to think clearly, creatively, and courageously.
Real talk example:
When my sink backed up at Easter, my initial thought was, "This meal is toast!" But when I shifted to, "I wonder if Vince is available to help me out so I can still get dinner on the table?" Everything changed. That simple wonder created the space for a solution-focused rather than panic-driven approach.
Your Turn: Wonder Practice
Next time you hit a business snag (or any curveball life throws your way):
Catch the first thought. (You know, the “Welp, it’s all falling apart” one.)
Take three slow breaths. Let your nervous system settle.
Swap panic for curiosity. Ask something like:
“I wonder what this is showing me?”“I wonder what’s possible now?”
Watch what shifts. Notice how your energy, perspective, and problem-solving open up.
This isn’t just mindset fluff—it’s a practical way to move from spiraling to strategic. That tiny moment of curiosity can help you take action that’s aligned, calm, and actually helpful.
Try it this week and see what happens. You might be surprised by how much power is contained in three breaths and one good question.
I'd love to hear how this goes for you. Reply in the comments with your experience, or better yet, share your biggest "I wonder..." reframe and what it revealed.
Until next time,
Lee
I love how you develop your strength well before you need it, if ever. This is like building other muscles...so you can tap in and stay calm. Terrific! Thank you for writing!